My life is anfractuous

Whoa – that got your attention, didn’t it?? Looks and sounds scary but it’s actually a word that many of us will understand, without initially knowing the meaning of the word. The definition: having many twists and turns; meandering; circuitous. In other words, much of life, right?

When we are young, we have some and expectations for the rest of our lives. We fully expect certain things to happen: careers, family, travel, whatever. We need those goals or we get stuck, spinning our wheels, trying to figure out where we are going. And if you don’t have an idea of where you want to go, you won’t know when you get there.

When I graduated from high school (back in the dark ages!) I was determined to be a physician (I know – don’t laugh!). That worked except for a couple of twists and turns that moved me in a different direction that very summer. I left for Purdue University having just experienced a major romantic breakup, and that Chemistry 101 class, designed to weed out those students who really shouldn’t be there, did its job. I left the university at Christmas break with a something less than stellar grade point average (think basement level numbers). Hard turn on that plan. I eventually finished my bachelor’s degree at the University of Southern Indiana – seventeen years after graduation, and then continued to receive a master’s degree from the University of Evansville!! A few side trips: marriage, children, and a couple of career changes that continued my circuitous journey through life, but I achieved my goal of a college education.

Fast forward a few years and I was single again, and fully expected to end my earthly life that way. That little idea was happily changed when I met someone and embarked in yet another direction that was quite unexpected, and has brought unimagined joy to my life! Another example of a meandering event that changed the course of my life.

My thoughts, opinions, ideas, and ideals have changed over the course of my life. Sometimes there was some literal wandering – physically and emotionally – but I always held on to the idea that I couldn’t stay where I was. I needed to continue growing and moving to be better than I was at any given moment. I can look back now at my anfractuous life and see where things took a hard right or left, and understand how those changes enriched and inspired my life and my very future.

So, what were your goals? Have they changed? Do you ever look back and wonder where those thoughts ideas came from, and where they went, and how they changed the trajectory of who you are? Always remember that looking back is helpful to see that our life did move forward. Don’t look back with regret – that will only lead to disappointment. Those twists and turns of fate, of decisions made – or not – moved us to the very place we are today, and whether we consciously agree or understand, where you are is exactly where you need to be. Look to the future to move you somewhere else. Follow the twisty path because it is the most interesting and joyful in the end, isn’t it? And where you are now is all that matters!